Funny Facebook Status

Here are some of funny Facebook status that you can use. I've collected it from different sites/ blog, my other website and compile it here. Check it out!
(Part 2)
(Part 3)

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Ø  Nakakatamad maging tamad. Ø  Di na ako mangangako, Promise! Ø  please like my status if you think im idiot. Ø  NOTHING IS ILLEGAL, UNTIL YOU GET CAUGHT!!!!! Ø  Im not lazy.. I just rest before I get tired.. Ø  laziness is the mother of all developments! Ø  THE ROAD TO SUCCESS is always under construction Ø  WE all want to be DIFFERENT which makes us all the SAME Ø  is protecting the world from evil.... Ø  What's on your mind? Ø  Ang Taong PANGIT sa PHOTOSHOP kumakapit... Ø  ang pera ko parang coke, kung hindi sakto, palaging zero... Ø  Only Adobe touches my Skin, who touch yours? Ø  scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal today’s status! Ø  "mula ulo... mukang paa" Ø  ayokong may mangyari sau pero pag may nangyari satin ok lang.. Ø  sana naging kandila ka na lang,para pag hinipan kita ptay ka na agad! Ø  is coming to town. Ø  aanhin pa ang damo? . kabayo ba ako? Ø  "dear facebook wall diary..." Ø  ''peter pan once said that when you close your eyes and think of what  you ever wanted to have., You'l fly....  But how cum when i think of you i fall???? .'' Ø  "single by choice... their choice" Ø  masama akong tao tulad mo, sa parehong paraan na mabuti kang tao tulad ko. Ø  "It's better late than pregnant" Ø  ang klase parang byahe, masarap tulugan. Ø  Wag mong ipagtutulakan ang taong nagmamahal sayo…… . . . baka matumba! Ø  "ang tunay na kagandahan ay na sa panloob lamang, kaya di ako lumalabas  ng bahay!" Ø  Is hacking facebook.com server. Ø  there are 70 ways to make me happy first is to LOVE ME!! the rest is 69! :) Ø  is "writing this to entertain the losers who take the time to actually  read what others ""status"" is". Ø  bakit ka magluluto kung wala ka namang iluluto. Ø  Teachers call it cheating, we call it teamwork! Ø  "...is awesome..." Ø  Without ME awesome would just be AWESO.. hehe Ø  Ang buhay ay parang gulong minsan nasa ibaba minsan nasa itaas ng bubong.. Ø  is not wearing underwear . Ø  when your friend flops you feel bad...but when your friend tops..you  feel even worse. Ø  Cheat if there's a Chance! Ø  ang hirap sau mayaman ka eh. Ayoko sa lahat ung gusto ko! Ø  Mukha Mo Pa lang... JOKE NA!! Ø  Teacher: We are descendant of Adam and Eve! Student: Thats not true! My dad said we are descendant of an ape! Teacher: We are not talking about your FAMILY! Ø  hindi lahat ng magaganda... ay babae!!! Ø  Is single and i want you to change this!